- I used to love my dad's stories,
until the one he told me on my tenth birthday.
- There once was a kingdom
where everybody lived forever.
But the problem with nobody ever dying
was that the kingdom got very crowded.
And so the king,
getting squeezed out of his own castle
by his endless royal lineage,
issued a decree.
- Everybody in my kingdom,
please pick one person from your family to die.
We will have a mass execution
that will bring forth much-needed space.
Sorry to bum everybody out,
but that's the way it goes.
-And each family showed up with their martyr,
all except one family.
- Sire, we can't decide.
We love each other so much
that we would all like to die together.
- Oh, no, they can't all die.
They run the bakery.
They make the best cinnamon buns in all the land.
- What if we each cut off a piece of ourselves?
And with all of these pieces combined,
it will be as if one less person lived in town.
- Interesting. Hmm.
Continue.
- But the daughter refused.
- [sighs] But, Dad, I like my limbs.
- Don't be selfish.
Would you rather one of us die?
- You can have my arm.
- I'll give my right ear.
- I see no problem losing some of my fingers.
- I'll throw in my nose.
- Guarantee me a leg,
and it's a deal.
- Well, I do have another one.
Okay, I'm in.
- [laughing]
- After the executioner had done the deed,
the family made an unsightly sight
and business went bad.
So the family started selling their cinnamon buns
by mail order to the next kingdom.
And since no one had to look at them,
they were a huge hit,
and they made heaps of dough.
And the father said to the daughter,
"You see what we can accomplish if we all stick together?"
The end.
- It was the last birthday party I ever had.
[brisk, whimsical music]
♪ ♪
There were two things I loved
more than anything in this world:
running and math.
My dad was a mathematician,
so loving math was loving my dad.
- What is this? What are you reading?
Pre-calculus? - Yep.
We both found safety in numbers.
In my family, 1 plus 1 equaled 3.
- I hope when you grow up that you...
- Life was good.
My father was a track star in college,
and I dreamed of the day that I would really and truly
run faster than he did.
But on the last good day my father had...
Dad!
Nobody won.
What's the matter?
That's when I started to knock on wood.
[knocking]
Each knock was a number,
and each number kept me safe.
Without them, I'd be alone.
[knocking]
Dad...
They know how to fix a body,
but would they be able to fix his mind?
My dad looked gray and gone,
but I knew he was in there somewhere,
and I was determined to get him back.
So I made a deal with the universe.
I would give up everything that I cared about,
and the universe would give me back my father.
I quit dessert.
[aerosol hissing]
I quit going to movies.
I quit my friends.
I quit flipping through atlases.
I even quit running.
The more I liked something,
the more I needed to ruin it.
The only thing I didn't quit was numbers.
[light knocking]
If I could jump rope 43 times without missing
or if I could catch the ball 27 times in a row,
if the number of falling leaves I counted
equaled the number of letters in my dad's name,
then maybe I would get him back.
I never stopped counting.
I never stopped hoping.
Numbers:
safe,
reliable,
perfect.
[chimes tinkling]
Then suddenly, my mother decided
that three was one number too many.
- You're kicking me out?
- You don't have friends.
You don't have a job.
[sighs] It's time for you to go.
- But I love it here.
- You're lying, Mona.
And what's worse is, you don't even know it.
I have to take care of him.
You don't.
[dog barking]
- [coughing]
By the third night,
my math book and l called it quits.
- We can help you with the first month's rent.
I've saved a little,
and Dad has his disability check.
- She'll never find an apartment
with a toilet as strong as ours.
- [sighs]
- [coughing roughly]
Suddenly I knew what infinity felt like.
It was really long.
[phone rings]
- Mom?
- Is this Mona Gray?
- Yeah.
- This is Ms. Gelband.
I was your elementary school principal.
- Yeah?
- Well, I just ran into your mother
in front of the bakery,
and our math teacher, Ms. Swordstrum,
suddenly flew off to Paraguay to become a revolutionary.
So your mother jumped in
and told me that you're living in town,
that you don't have a job,
but you have a college degree
in math.
You're it. - It?
- Our new math teacher.
I remember at recess when you were a child,
while all the other kids were playing kickball,
you sat on the monkey bars doing long division.
You're perfect for the job, Mona Gray.
- Why would you tell her I had a math degree
when I quit college?
- You need to find a way to pay rent.
- Why?
You're the one who kicked me out.
- You might like teaching.
- I'll hate it.
[car door clicks open]
- The welcome wagon officially welcomes you!
We like to think of ourselves as being ahead of the curve.
One teacher for each subject.
I guess that makes you our very own Ms. Math.
[laughs]
We may want to lighten up the decor,
something cheery and "math is fun"-ish.
- You made a mistake.
I'm not a teacher.
I--
- There's an old saying:
"No one is a teacher until they're a teacher."
- I had math in this room with Mr. Jones.
- 1, 2, 3,
5, 8,
13, 21...
Who can tell me the next number in this pattern?
Miss Gray?
- 34.
- You are correct!
- I never saw him without a wax number around his neck.
The numbers varied according to his mood.
He'd go higher in a better mood,
lower if he felt lower.
I wondered if he had the numbers my dad needed.
To the world, they were just numbers.
But to us, they were invisible signs.
Mr. Jones quit teaching and opened a hardware store.
And I was the only one who understood why.
He was trying to get his numbers up.
We don't talk anymore.
- So can I count on you?
[bell ringing]
[children shouting]
[footsteps clomping]
- Hi, first graders.
I'm Miss Gray.
- Miss Gray, you're it!
- Um-- Um, no.
- Can we call you Mommy?
- Oh!
[bell ringing]
Second graders,
look at all the numbers on the wall.
Guys, please.
[bell ringing]
- No way! Check it out!
- Pretty awesome numbers.
- I like the 2.
I like the 9 a lot.
- I like the 5.
- Are you the third grade?
- Yes.
- What's your name?
- Elmer Gravlaki.
- Okay. Thank you.
Sit down...please.
Um...
let's play a game.
How about you say your name
along with your favorite number?
[loud snap] - Ow!
He shot me!
[laughter]
It's not funny!
- What's your name?
- Danny O'Mazzi.
- Danny, you can't shoot people in the head,
so go stand in the corner and face the wall.
- Cool.
- No fair!
Why does he get to stand in the corner
facing the wall?
- Well, it's not supposed to be a good thing.
It's supposed to be a punishment.
- Miss Gray, I'm Rita Williams, and I want you to know
that Ellen always pees when she gets nervous.
She has a change of clothes in a cubby
in the nurse's office.
- Go and do that, then, Ellen.
- Miss Gray, I'm Lisa Venus,
and my favorite number is a billion.
- What?
- You told us to say our name and our favorite number.
- Yeah, get with the program.
- And you are...
- Ann DiGanno.
- Lisa, how about choosing a number between 1 and 9?
- 9--I mean...
2-- no, 7.
- 7?
- For sure 7.
- Okay.
Do I have any other volunteers?
- Ooh, ooh, me, me.
Oh, oh, me. Pick me.
My name is Levan Beeze,
and my favorite number is 1.
- Okay.
Levan, you and Lisa
come to the front and form your numbers with your bodies.
- What is this?
- And what's the total of Levan and Lisa?
- 8.
- That's right.
- The bugs in her gross hair gave her the answer.
- I don't have bugs in my hair.
- Ann's in a bad mood
because her parents are getting divorced.
My mom is her mom's attorney.
- They're not getting divorced!
They're getting legally separated.
- Levan, client-attorney confidentiality is confidential.
Shh.
All right, who wants to be the 8?
- I'll do it.
- Okay, Danny.
Who wants to be the plus sign?
- Me! - Pick me!
- This is our first human equation.
[laughter]
- Cool.
- What are we gonna do now?
- How about if we...
How about, uh...
What if we...
make numbers out of nature?
One of you will bring in a number
every Friday,
kind of like a show-and-tell with numbers.
And we'll call it...
"numbers and materials."
- Can I go first?
- Okay, Lisa Venus, bring in a good one.
Okay.
- I'm glad you're the new math teacher.
- Dad?
Dad!
Today was my first day--
- [exhaling]
[laughing] Mona, Mona...
I read about this in a book
by a Harvard medical professor.
This is called "the shape of health."
Come here. Let me show you.
Come here.
All right, now, according to this book,
Olympic athletes who were hurt, they used this, right?
They've done studies.
The damage goes out
through the gap in the circle.
Honey, it's a reliable book.
You want to-- you want to come in?
Just come on in.
You can feel it, right?
Honey, just sit here. Sit right here.
And just take a deep breath in, right?
And then just let it all out through the gap.
[inhaling]
Deep breath.
[inhaling]
And let it all out.
[exhales] Let go. Let go. Let go.
[exhaling]
Start it again.
In... [inhaling]
And out.
[exhaling]
- What's going on?
- It's called "the shape of health."
- I'm calling Dr. Wallace.
These medications are not working either.
And you're not helping.
- Hey, I have a doctor from the Harvard medical school.
[bell ringing]
- Rock candy experiment gone awry.
It makes a mess, but the kids love it.
These are never filled.
[sighs]
This your sherbert?
- No.
- It's a funny name, right?
Sherbert.
Like, if you say it a bunch of times, it's--
Sherbert.
I guess it's not really that funny,
but it's a weird name.
Sherbert.
So you're the new math teacher?
You're Miss Gray?
- Uh-huh.
- I'm Ben.
Ben Smith. I teach science.
- What were you thinking
with that houseplant assignment?
- Oh, the houseplant assignment.
Half the class was supposed to talk kindly to their houseplants
and the other half wasn't,
and then we were gonna compare their respective growth rates.
Why? What's up?
- Rita Williams' mother found her
yelling at her bathroom fern,
saying things like,
"You're a disgrace to the family name,"
and, "What are you looking at, you...
skanky piece of bitch?"
- What was the plant's reaction?
- Now, don't you get cheeky.
Shall we discuss this in my office, Mr. Smith?
- We have to discuss this in your office.
See you around, Miss Gray.
- Miss Gray, the 7 of the clouds fell.
Miss Gray.
- Hey! Watch it, doody-boy!
- Sorry.
[laughter]
- What is she wearing?
- It looks like garbage.
- Lisa Venus...
- Yes?
- What's that on your head?
- It's an I.V.
Get it? Those are my initials.
- No, they're not.
- Those aren't your initials.
- They almost are.
- You're retarded.
- Ann.
- I'm ready for "numbers and materials."
- "Numbers and materials"?
- Remember?
Every Friday, we bring in numbers
from the world of nature.
- Or things that just look like numbers.
- Duh, Miss Gray.
You never remember anything.
How the hell did you ever get to be our teacher?
- Danny, in the corner.
- Cool.
- Lisa, numbers and materials, please.
- This is my zero.
It's from nature.
- That's not nature. That's plastic.
- Plastic comes from nature.
- It's man-made, and man is natural.
- Uh-huh.
- Zero times anything is zero.
127 minus zero equals 127.
10 billion minus zero equals 10 billion.
- What? - Duh.
- [chuckles softly]
Good.
- What's so good about it?
- Ann.
Thank you.
So who wants to go next week?
- Me! - Me!
- Ooh, ooh!
- Miss Gray!
- Fireflies aren't flies or bugs but beetles.
And they exist on every continent,
except Antarctica.
- Why do they glow?
- That's a good question.
Mainly so they can find their mate.
The males flash their signal, and they wait.
And they wait for the females...
To respond.
[chuckles softly]
[thunder booming]
[rain pattering]
- Lisa? - Miss Gray!
- Are you waiting for someone?
- My aunt.
She's always late.
Want to touch my I.V.?
Go ahead.
Touch it.
- [laughs nervously]
Where'd you get it?
- My mom.
She's got really bad cancer
and wears a red wig.
Guess what kind of cancer she has.
- Uh...
Lung?
- No.
- Colon?
- No.
- Mouth?
- No.
- Throat? - No.
- Breast? - No.
- Liver? - No.
- Pancreas? - No.
- Blood? - No.
- Brain? - No.
- Bone? - No.
- Skin? - No.
- What else is there?
- Eye cancer.
- I've never heard of that.
- It's brand-new.
My mom's one of the first.
She'll die in less than a year.
- Is there anything I can do?
- I like pirates.
I hate Ann DiGanno.
Are you sick?
- What do you mean?
[car horn beeping]
- Lisa! Hurry up!
- If you want to do something for me,
then never get sick, ever.
- Lisa!
[knocking]
- He doesn't need a cardiologist, Eva.
He needs a psychiatrist.
- [crying] What's wrong?
Mom, what is this?
- Nothing.
He's fine. Let's go.
- Mom. - Let's go.
- No matter how many times I asked,
the answer was always the same:
"Nothing."
Lisa wore the truth like a crown.
She made jewelry out of saline and plastic.
And all I had was the word "nothing."
[snoring]
[phone rings]
Dad?
- [humming happily]
♪ Happy birthday, Mona Gray ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
Yay!
Let's go out for breakfast for a change,
like a family.
- But we are a family.
- Like another family, then.
Hi, a table for three, please.
Thank you.
- I can't sit here.
It's--
There's a draft.
- Oh.
Is this okay?
- No, no, no. This is dirty.
Look further back.
No, no, no.
No.
This is right under the air conditioner.
- Oh.
Is this to your liking?
- This is fine. It's fine.
Thank you so much.
Fine.
- It's great.
- Now...let's have fun.
It's Mona's birthday.
- Mona, I want you to go to the hardware store.
I want you to pick up a five-pound bag of plant food.
- No, no, no, no. Not now, no.
No, we are celebrating.
- Mona... it's a surprise.
This arrived on your birthday.
It's...
magnet therapy.
- Magnets?
- Shh, okay, quiet.
Keep your voice down,
because I don't want this getting back to the FDA.
- Why?
Because the--
[whispering] Because they can confiscate it.
They can recede the shape of health.
They can try to get rid of the shape of health.
- Mona, don't upset your father.
- Miss Gray.
Hi.
These your folks?
Hi, I'm Ben Smith.
Your daughter and l work together.
I'm the science teacher.
- Hi, I'm Mona's mom.
- You're Mr. Gray, I presume?
- Um...
Please, join us.
- Oh...okay.
Just...excuse me.
The moby platter here is fantastic,
and the French toast is really--
- Are you from the FDA?
- No.
- So...are you from around here?
- The short version is,
I moved here when my fiancée got a bookkeeping job
at the hospital.
- Oh.
- Then she ran off with a male nurse.
That was fun.
They stole my car.
- [laughs]
Oh, I'm sorry.
It's a tragedy. I'm s--I'm sorry.
- But it's okay.
I made a mistake.
Turns out all my calculations were wrong.
Wow, I'm sure you've heard this tons of times,
but you guys, you look so much alike.
- [laughs] Really?
Everybody says the lips. [knocking]
- Oh, yeah, without a doubt.
[knocking intensifies]
- So how did you get into science?
- I've always been attracted to knowing
why things are the way they are.
[knocking continues]
There's a bit of Dad in there too, but I'm seeing--
- "l want to be a scientist."
[knocking continues]
- I think I'm gonna go run that errand for Dad.
- Mona, no.
We didn't have--
- I can help you out, Miss Gray.
- Wait! - Five-pound bag.
- Buy a gift for--Mona, please. - You want me to come with you?
- Your birthday! It's Mona's birthday.
- Happy birthday!
- Mr. Jones.
I'm here to show you the newest Panida Tool catalog.
- I have everything I need.
- Here's my card.
You'll come around.
Have a nice day.
- I said something about his numbers for the first time
when I was nine.
Hi, Mr. Jones.
I'm glad you're feeling better,
nine times better than yesterday.
Yesterday you were a two.
- That's a nice thing for a kid to notice.
You are a very good noticer.
- Notice?
I'd wake up in the morning and think,
"lf Mr. Jones wears an even number,
my dad will laugh today."
"lf Mr. Jones wears an odd number,
the new medication will work."
[knocking]
"He must know a number that could help."
But if he did, he didn't tell me.
He was just one more neighbor that looked away.
So I decided to egg his car every Halloween
with five dozen eggs.
[scraping]
Hi, Mr. Jones.
- Hi, Mona.
- So...why do you wear those numbers
around your neck like that?
- I thought you knew.
- Knew?
Knew what?
I was wearing an invisible sign of my own.
It said, "Up yours, hypocrite."
I'll take that ax.
- It's $28.
- Do you see what we can accomplish
if we all stick together?
You see what we can accomplish?
[children counting]
[counting continues]
[ax clanks]
[children counting]
- Ugh!
- Why did you do that?
- [gasps]
[distant siren wailing]
- [breathing heavily]
At home, it was an ax.
At school, it was a 7.
A little construction paper and some glue sticks,
I could turn my nightmare into "numbers and materials."
- [coughing]
[gasping and choking]
- Levan?
What's the matter?
- [weakly] It's the scurvy!
- Scurvy?
Who told you that?
- [whimpering]
- Ann, Ann, what's wrong with you?
- My tongue is swollen! My tongue!
- Your tongue!
- [screaming wildly]
- Oh, God!
Your tongue?
[children screaming]
Danny, what's wrong with you?
- Malaria!
- Malaria?
[touch-tones beeping]
[line rings]
- 911 emergency.
- 911, I need to report an epidemic.
- What's your location?
- What about chicken pox? Rickets?
You know, you could do... - Excuse me, miss?
- You could do malaria next week
if you do a really good consumption today.
What do you think?
- Wait. What are my symptoms?
- Fatigue, cough. Let me hear a cough.
- [coughs] - Yeah, get it deep.
- We're gonna send a dispatch.
- [coughs] - Deeper.
- [coughs] - That's perfect.
Some abdominal cramping.
Bend over, like you got gas.
- Okay, like that?
- Yeah. Go get 'em.
- [coughing]
- Good stuff, Elmer.
It's like heavy gas.
- What's going on?
- We're life acting.
- Ma'am?
- It helps the kids understand symptoms
for our health segment.
- You...
are...
fired!
- You barely say two words to me...
and then you fire me?
[child groaning]
[groaning continues]
- Get up, Lisa.
You're not sick.
- [groaning] I have cancer.
[groaning]
My mom's wig is made out of human hair.
They had ones that weren't, but you could tell.
- Come on, let's just go.
- Hang on.
I have a little more cancer to do.
[groaning]
- Uh, Miss Gray, what's that?
- It's a 7.
- That's not a 7. That's an ax.
- It's a 7.
- Teacher's big fat pet.
- That's enough, Ann!
- Ann's in a bad mood because her dad has a girlfriend.
And my mom, who's Ann's mom's attorney,
has pictures to prove it.
- Does not. - Does too.
- Levan, no tattletaling.
You're gonna have to go stand in the corner.
[laughter]
Okay, um...
Does anyone know what this is?
- It's a bird's beak.
- It's kind of like a mouth.
- It's a bird's asshole!
[laughter]
- Danny!
Get in that corner!
So let's pretend it's a mouth,
and the mouth is always hungry.
And 179 is less than 255.
The mouth always wants to eat the greater number.
- Psst!
The mouth eats 5,556 because it's more.
- That's right.
This is called "greater than" and "less than."
Who wants to come up and do their own?
- What is he doing in this classroom?
- I'm dying of diphtheria!
[laughter]
- Get out of my class right now!
Ugh!
- Not again, Ellen.
- "Fake sick..."
That's easy.
Fake sick is less than real sick.
- "Car crash"?
- I don't know if you can compare those two.
- Yes, I can.
- I was in a car crash once.
I lived.
- "War."
- "Old age"?
- Old age isn't greater than war.
- This is all wrong.
- Sick is the greatest.
- "Bloody murder"?
[all murmuring]
- Mine is the greatest.
- No, it isn't.
- That's how serial killers are made, man.
Sad but true.
- "Cancer"?
- Fight.
all: Fight, fight, fight!
- Wait! Stop it, you two!
Stop it! [bell ringing]
Stop! I'm gonna call your parents!
- Her mom won't even know. - Shut up!
- Ann!
- You should have better control over the class, Miss Gray.
- Remember to do greater-thans and less-thans!
Page 64!
Lisa.
No person is any greater than any other person.
- That's not true.
You're the greatest teacher in the school.
- You know, my dad's sick too.
- Lisa, aren't you late for class?
- Ahoy, Ms. Gelband.
- Well, Miss Gray,
Lisa seems to be happy in your class.
You must be creating a very nice environment.
Although I can't figure out
why, for yesterday's lunch,
she brought cigarettes, bologna, margarine,
and a packet of artificial sweetener.
Did you ever hear of such a thing?
- Sounds like a themed lunch,
a cancer-themed lunch.
- [gasps]
Oh, by golly, you're right.
Thank goodness she has someone
as wonderfully stable as you in her life.
- Thank goodness.
- Well...
see you tonight.
- Tonight?
- Open school night.
8:00 sharp.
- [sighs]
- If we had left on time...
- No. Why don't you back off?
- Why don't you back off? We're here.
We should see all of Ann's teachers.
- Well, let's see the math teacher last.
Ann said she's a weirdo-bizarro.
- Hi.
You must be the math teacher.
I'm Lisa's aunt.
- Lisa's one of my brightest students.
- I always hated math, you know?
But Lisa's a strange kid.
- Well, you know, it must not be easy for her
right now.
- Mm.
What about me?
You know, I drove halfway across the country
to take care of her and...
haven't gotten so much as a "thank you" from anyone.
You know, I was gonna get my real estate license,
maybe go back to school.
Now I can't do anything.
- Well, maybe when her mother recovers--
- Recovers?
What spaceship did you fall out of?
- Excuse me.
Sorry.
- ♪ In my heaven ♪
♪ It's the white walls ♪
♪ The white walls ♪
♪ Of my... ♪ [humming]
[stops singing]
Did my seductive singing lure you out here?
- No, l--
- If anyone asks, this is a science demonstration.
Spheres.
I'm also avoiding the parents.
- Me too.
- So...we agree on something?
- [laughs lightly]
- Is that a smile?
- No. - Yes.
You look really nice when you smile.
- I should get back inside.
- No, wait. Don't go.
We're making progress.
Hey, remember, the last time I saw you,
you fired me.
You fired me.
- [laughs lightly]
- Don't worry about it.
If anyone's getting fired around here, it's you.
I saw the 5 Ellen made out of pork the other day.
That was...
That gave me nightmares.
- Well, you have--
you have Lisa doing cancer.
- Yeah, I know.
- You know her mother has cancer.
- Sure. That's why she picks it.
- She's dying.
- Sure.
That's why she picks it.
- I'm gonna--
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.
Want to try?
Give it a try.
- I'm not really a bubbles person.
- Who isn't a bubbles person?
Come on. Bubbles is circles.
That's math. That's 360.
Come on, big ones.
Everybody loves bubbles.
You know, when I first saw you, you were...
you were teaching,
and you had the kids in the front of the room,
and they were...
They were all...
posing as numbers.
I like that.
That's when l...
And that's when I knew there was something about you.
- You know...
I, um-- I got to go back in.
I got to go back inside.
- You just had it.
- Good night, Mr. Smith.
- Good night, Miss Gray.
- Once, this woman in Texas
wrote out all the numbers from 1 to 1 billion.
It took a few years...
and a lot of paper.
- Did she use recycled paper?
- I don't know.
- 'Cause if she did, then that's a good story.
But if she didn't, then that's a bad story.
- You know, you should tell your aunt
to pack you a better lunch.
You can't live off potato chips and chocolate milk.
- Yes, I can.
That's what pirates eat.
- Why do you like pirates?
- My dad took me on a real pirate ship
when I was really, really little.
Can I live with you after my mom dies?
[knocking]
- My apartment is small.
- I'm not that big.
- You can't,
because...
it wouldn't be fair to the other students.
I mean, I could help you with your math homework,
and it just wouldn't be fair.
- Makes sense.
[knocking]
- They were pissed off.
- I think you're a brilliant teacher.
- Are you avoiding me, Miss Gray?
- No.
I thought I dropped something out the window.
- Like what,
a quadratic equation?
- More like a decimal point.
- I saw that decimal point.
It went flying that way.
- Decimal points don't fly.
- What do they do?
- They careen.
- You are the strangest woman I've ever met.
- So?
- So...
Come on.
I'll help you find that...
careening decimal point.
I'm going to the movies.
- I don't like the movies.
- That's all right. I wasn't asking you to go.
All right, you can go to the movies with me
if you want.
- ♪ Living in a tree, yeah, that's where I'd like to be ♪
- I don't...go to the movies.
- That's crazy.
That's like saying you don't listen to music.
- ♪ No one can say nothing ♪
♪ Which I guess means they'll say something ♪
- I hate...music.
- What lie is that? Three?
- ♪ I'll be in my tree ♪
- I need to go to the hardware store
to get some nails.
- Lie four.
- I hate cop movies.
- That's five.
- That's not funny.
- Yeah, one, we got the music.
We got-- Yeah, that's five.
You're lying a lot.
- ♪ Chaos in the streets ♪
- Everything about you is funny.
Come to the movies with me.
You can buy me popcorn.
Or do you hate popcorn but not really?
- I need nails.
- I sit in the middle of the middle.
- ♪ I'm living free ♪
♪ As any child would want to be ♪
- 42.
[helicopter rotors whirring]
[indistinct radio chatter]
[siren wailing]
[tires screech]
- Let's go, guys!
Come on, guys!
[gunfire]
[indistinct radio chatter]
[suspenseful music]
[siren wailing]
[gunshots, tires screeching]
- Hey.
Hey, where you going?
- I forgot to get popcorn.
- There's plenty for two right here.
- But I like butter.
- Shh!
- It's soaked in butter.
- Sit down, lady.
- Sit.
That guy right there,
he's an expert bank robber,
and he got caught making his last big score.
But the police discovered this serial killer
who leaves his victims in bank vaults,
then stuffs their insides with money,
so now the police need--
- Shh!
- [whispering] The help of the bank robber.
- What denomination of money are they stuffed with?
- Shh!
- I can't answer that.
But it's an interesting question.
That's my thumb, Miss Gray.
- I'm sorry. - You don't have to--
- You better stop talking.
- Hey, why don't you get another seat, man?
- Why don't you?
- Did you just defend my honor?
- What?
[footsteps pounding]
- [breathing heavily]
[pounding]
- Mona!
[breathing heavily]
[door clicks open]
- How did you know where I live?
- I followed you.
But you're fast.
Very fast.
- I used to...run.
- Why'd you run out of the movie theater?
I recognize that artist.
Who did that?
- Paul.
- It's kind of a lonely 7.
Who did the volcano?
- Ellen.
- Ba-ba-ba-ba-bah!
I like that one.
Oh, I like this potted--
- Bouquet of numbers.
- And there's...
- Lisa. A six of eyelashes.
- [laughs]
Are they real?
[both laugh]
- I think so.
- I like you.
I haven't liked anyone...
like this in a long time.
- How long were you engaged?
- Seven months.
- Which months?
- December to July.
Why?
- That's 212 days,
unless it was a leap year.
- [laughs softly]
You know that?
- Yeah.
- You know that?
- I have to go to the bathroom.
- You okay?
- [breathing quickly]
[gagging]
[coughing]
[muffled coughing]
- What's wrong?
- Just...
not into it.
- You were with me before.
- No, I wasn't.
- What did you do in the bathroom?
- Please leave.
- Liar.
[children chattering]
- Class!
Class!
I'm Miss Gray, and I'm a weirdo.
Who wants to come up here and be a booger?
- Miss Gray is not a weirdo.
- Yes, she is.
And so are you.
[laughter]
[silence]
- Ann.
- You're late.
And it's my turn to do "numbers and materials."
- Is it really your turn?
- I'm not a liar.
Ta-da.
See? It's a perfect number.
- Awesome!
- Where did you get that?
- I made it.
42 plus 5 equals 48.
- No, it's not. It's 47.
- You didn't make it.
I know who it belongs to.
- It's mine, and I made it.
[bell ringing]
[children chattering]
- Go on, Lisa.
- Okay, but don't let her get away with anything.
- So how about you and I go to the hardware store together
and we'll give the number back to Mr. Jones?
I mean, he'll be so happy that he got his number back,
he may even give you a reward.
- A reward?
I don't want a stupid reward.
And you cannot keep me from recess.
- Give...it...to me.
- Weirdo.
- I'll go.
I'll go to the hardware store with you.
Then you can take me to visit my mom.
- Hey, you psyched
for the sulfuric acid experiment tomorrow?
We're gonna rock that.
- Mr. Smith.
- What's up?
- Want to come to the hardware store
with me and Miss Gray?
- I can't.
I have my after-school science club meeting.
I have to show up because I said I would,
and I always mean what I say and say what I mean.
I'm a straight shooter.
Not everyone is, but...
Hey, listen, thanks for the invite.
- You're gonna miss a good time.
- Mr. Jones?
Mr. Jones?
If he's not here, why would he leave his door open?
- Maybe he was captured by pirates.
This way.
- "And falling on a bench, he laughed until the tears..."
- Mom! Nan!
- Hi.
- This is my math teacher, Miss Gray.
- Is she an invisible math teacher?
- Miss Gray?
This is Miss Gray.
- Lisa, you want to get some potato chips?
- Aye-aye, matey.
- Arr! Shiver me timbers.
Well, come on.
- [giggling]
- I really like your hair.
- [chuckles softly]
You can't catch cancer.
- Lisa asked me to bring her here today.
- Yeah, she doesn't like my sister very much.
But she likes you.
- I like her too.
Her dad got her into pirates, she said.
- No.
Lisa never knew her father.
- Well, l--I thought--
- Would you...
look in on Lisa from time to time?
- Of course.
[doorbell ringing]
[frantic knocking]
Mr. Jones!
Mom?
Dad?
Have you seen Mr. Jones?
Mom, have you seen Mr. Jones?
- He's gone.
And I can't find my car keys.
- Who's gone? Mr. Jones?
- No, Mona. Your dad.
Your dad's gone.
- What? Where did he go?
- I don't know where.
I don't know where he is.
And I found these behind the washing machine.
He's been hiding them,
and I don't know for how long he's not taking them.
- This never would have happened if I still lived here.
- Stop it!
You can't help him!
And I don't know where he is.
- Dad? - Is that your father?
I've been trying to get him to move,
but he won't get up.
- Dad.
- The energy is trapped in this circle,
and it needs to be released.
- Let's go home.
- Do you need me to make a call for you?
- No, we're fine. Thank you.
Why did you stop taking your medicine?
- Because they're poison.
And they'll poison my body.
- No, it'll help you.
- You understand?
I have to dig right here.
If I don't open this...
I--
- Please...
Let's just go home.
- Don't you want me to get better?
- That's all I want.
[knocking]
[children chattering]
- I have my "numbers and materials."
I know it's not Friday, but this one's special.
It's my dad's fake arm.
- Cool!
- It looks like a number 1, right?
- Can I touch it?
- Pretty awesome, huh?
- It doesn't look like a 1.
It looks like an arm.
- It does too look like a number 1.
[children chattering]
- Why did your dad's arm fall off?
- It didn't fall off. It got blown off in the war.
Should I subtract now, Miss Gray?
Miss Gray.
- What?
- Should I subtract now?
Hey, that's my dad's!
- Elmer!
- Give it back! [laughter]
- Get back here!
- Elmer, give Danny back his dad's arm.
- Give it back right now!
- Elmer!
Hey, Elmer!
Give it!
Elmer, give it back!
- Give it back!
- Miss Gray, you can't control the class.
You're gonna get fired.
- Shut up.
- No one cares about you, Lisa.
- Give me the arm! - No!
- Help!
[laughter]
- Miss Gray, look!
[children gasp]
- I'm gonna divide you,
subtract you, and multiply you.
- Lisa!
Go stand by the door.
- Ha!
- Ann, you need to learn how to be nice!
- [whimpering] Oh, my God.
- l, uh...
Okay.
I'm sorry.
I--
[sighs]
[loud thud, glass shatters]
[children shouting]
- Lisa! Lisa!
Lisa. Lisa.
- Let me go. - Stop it.
- Let me go! - Stop!
- [crying] My mom died.
She died!
Why can't I get cancer too?
- I'm sorry.
- I'm sick of Lisa showing off.
- Ann!
- I'm gonna chop her into pieces.
[sobbing]
- Ann...
put the ax down.
- I'm gonna chop her!
- No, you're not.
- I'm gonna chop her into pieces.
- You're not gonna chop anyone.
- I'm sick of her.
- Please?
- And I'm sick of you.
- Give me the ax.
There comes a moment when you look around,
waiting for the person in charge to help you,
and then you realize you're the person in charge.
You are the grown-up.
You're the only grown-up there.
And you're not very good at it.
Life is much, much harder than math.
Dad!
[children screaming]
- Miss Gray!
[children screaming and shouting]
[shouting fades]
- I got nine stitches.
- I got 27.
- 9 times 3 equals 27.
- You're correct.
[knocking]
- What are you doing?
- I'm doing what you do.
[knocking]
I used to imitate you at lunch.
The bench makes the same sound as your desk.
Why do you do it?
- Why? Um...
I do it when I feel...
Alone.
- Then that's why I do it.
I want to be like you.
- Don't do that.
Don't be like me.
- But I'm alone.
I'm all alone.
- Not only did you bring an ax to school,
but you lied about having a college degree.
Shame on you.
You're a wonderful math teacher, Miss Gray.
But you are never allowed to step foot in my school
ever again.
[doorbell ringing]
- Mr. Jones!
Ow!
Hello? [woman shrieks]
- What are you doing?
Get out of here!
- You're not dead?
- Why would I be dead?
- What's going on? - I don't know.
- I found your numbers all over town,
and your store was left open.
Your car's gone--
- Get out of my bedroom.
- Who is this girl?
- Mona Gray.
- Mona Gray, will you please get out?
- Should I call the police? - No.
- But you need your numbers.
How are you gonna know
how you feel or who you are without them?
- Andrea, I'll be right back.
I'm sorry.
- So why don't you need your numbers anymore?
- Why do you care?
- I care because you're the reason I love math.
You taught me numbers were everything.
And I noticed your numbers,
and I used to keep a vertical bar graph
measuring them against your moods.
- You made a graph?
Would you like to sit?
I left the store open, I sold my car,
all because of 42.
Who gives a damn about anything else
when you're wearing a 42?
- I saw you that day.
- A marvelous day,
the tops I've ever been.
- How did you get to be 42?
- And I realized if I don't have to be a number,
I can be anything.
I don't understand why you're suddenly interested.
You were the meanest little girl I ever knew.
You egged my car every Halloween.
- [chuckles]
You knew that was me?
- Of course.
What I don't know was why you would do that.
- Because you ignored me.
And you ignored my father.
- What?
- You never asked about him once.
- Yes, I did.
- No, you didn't.
- One day, you were-- you were playing in the yard,
and I asked you what happened to your dad.
He seems faded.
- Uh-uh. - I did! I most certainly did.
You were standing right there
wearing your green rubber boots,
throwing rocks at that tree.
I asked about your dad, and you said to me,
"Shut up, Mr. Jones."
I should have asked you again.
I'm sorry.
Maybe that day, you just weren't yourself.
- I don't think I've ever been myself.
- So what is wrong with your dad?
- He thinks he's about to die.
- Do you think he's about to die?
- Do you miss running?
Do you want to know how I hurt my leg?
You never asked.
- I'm sorry.
I've been thinking about
cutting another shape of health into the backyard
but this time with a larger radius,
because the last one was too small,
but I'm thinking about trying one with a bigger range.
What do you think?
- I don't think I can keep you company anymore.
- My beautiful child.
It's perfectly fine with me
if you just want to wait in the car.
- He didn't get it.
But I finally did.
[knocking]
- Got this in the mail.
I thought it was a little wordy.
- I didn't know what else to say.
- Lisa insisted that l come see you.
- How is she?
- Quieter than she used to be.
- I'm sorry.
You were right.
I was lying.
Just so you know,
next time,
if there's ever gonna be a next time,
when I say I'm going to the bathroom,
don't let me.
- I'm not gonna be your bathroom monitor, Miss Gray.
Mona?
I forgot to tell you something.
I lied.
I will be your bathroom monitor.
- I don't need a bathroom monitor.
- You don't?
I didn't mean to just barge in like that.
- It's okay.
Thanks for coming back.
[light tapping]
- Miss Gray?
Alisha Beeze, Levan's mom.
I'm an attorney, and I think you have an excellent case
against Ann DiGanno's family as well as the school district.
You could be looking at a large settlement.
- There's really only one thing I want.
- And this one states that in exchange for your job back,
you agree to drop the lawsuit,
attend night school to get your teaching degree,
and promise to never bring hardware supplies
into the classroom again.
- Pen?
- Great show for you today.
- This whole thing is so unfair.
I can't even go on a date when she's around.
I'm not heartless.
I'm not.
I'm just not ready.
I know that it's awful.
But I don't want her.
- I do.
My dad's fairy tale had it backwards.
Love doesn't mean
you have to sacrifice parts of yourself.
The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.
What do you see?
- Look.
- Oh, yeah.
Do I have any volunteers?
Okay, my little eye spies...
Isabelle and David and Kevin.
There were 122 frogs in one pond
and 57 in another.
How many frogs were there total?
- That's not a good math story.
179.
- Nice!
- Do you know any better ones?
- Let me think.
I got one.
- Put a 3 in it and a pirate.
- ♪ What a surprise ♪
♪ Oh, it's a sunny day ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, ohh ♪
♪ Give me, give me, give me, give me ♪
♪ What I want ♪
♪ I want sunshine ♪
♪ Sunshi-i-ine ♪
♪ Give me, give me, give me 'cause it's been so long ♪
♪ I want sunshine ♪
♪ Sunshi-i-i-ine ♪
♪ l-i-ine ♪
♪ ♪
♪ I'm feeling so free ♪
♪ Like a summer breeze ♪
♪ Oh, it must be magic ♪
♪ I forget all my plans ♪
♪ Throw my toes in the sand ♪
♪ I just can't help it ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, ohh ♪
♪ Give me, give me, give me, give me what I want ♪
♪ I want sunshine ♪
♪ Sunshi-i-ine ♪
♪ Give me, give me, give me 'cause it's been so long ♪
♪ I want sunshine ♪
♪ Sunshi-i-i-ine ♪
♪ We're two of a kind ♪
♪ Like bluebirds singing out a simple tune ♪
♪ If you don't mind ♪
♪ It's the perfect kind of day ♪
♪ To fall in love ♪
♪ With you, ohh ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
- ♪ Perfect kind of day, oh, oh ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
- ♪ To fall in love ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Give me, give me, give me, give me what I want ♪
♪ I want sunshine ♪
♪ Sunshi-i-ine ♪
♪ Give me, give me, give me 'cause it's been so long ♪
♪ I want sunshine ♪
♪ Sunshi-i-i-ine ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
- ♪ Sunshi-i-i-ine ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
- ♪ Sunshi-i-i-ine ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
- ♪ Sunshi-i-i-ine ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
- ♪ Sunshi-i-i-ine ♪
[gentle piano music]
♪ ♪